okay, NOW, what do you think?

i changed the template again. if anyone saw the old one it was like i made it when i was 16 on a sugar binge while watching fast paced cartoons that can give you seizures. i am not totally pleased with this one, but...COOKIE! cookie monster is my man even though producers have been forced to make him say that cookies are a sometimes food because some parents find it more productive to complain about *(#@&*^#%@ cookie monster instead of parenting their children. tangent there. i do like how he pops up to say hi after you scroll down. i did make changes to a day in the life... that i absolutely love! YaY :)

this is what's going wrong...

ok, so yesterday i hadn't eaten much at all as per usual it seems...at night i got the munchies and walked to the corner store and got smartfood popcorn and reese's pieces. and i ate the whole 5 and 3 servings respectively. i was hungry because i hadn't eaten. and i enjoyed the snacky-ness of it, it was fun to eat. annoying. but everything in moderation i guess. does that apply to binge eating?

today i have only had...lemon, 1 bread, 2 eggs, smartbalance oil, coffee, tea, skim milk. i should eat something. i walked only a little today. i might exerbike, but i showered so i might wait until tomorrow. no plans for the weekend.

whaddya think?

new layout! it might be too much for the eyes. what do you think? i used a lot of pink which is actually quite rare for me. and it might be too light. what do you think? i might change it. i might keep it. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

UPDATE: I reversed the colors and it feels way more "me" now. what do you think?

*another* new plan!

ok, well, in the previous post a week ago i stated things that did not happen, mainly that i was going to keep track of my food and exercise daily. i actually could probably remember day by day but that might hurt my brain and seems pointless so instead i'll give a recap. and i still think it's a good idea to keep track of everything. maybe i will start that tomorrow.

i have been taking my thyroid supplement daily. it's been a week+, woot! i've still been doing morning stretches every day and using my feldenkraus block for deeper neck and back stretching. i walked to and from bus-stops and places. i used the exercise bike at least one day for like an hour. my recliner broke and i had pieces leaning on the bike, i since have moved them and used it as mentioned. i haven't had much of an appetite. i've been eating all the same stuff since i haven't been to the store. i ordered in from the vegan asian place on oscar night and *still* have leftovers, i should really eat that tonight even though it's 10pm.

i also realized that i haven't drank in a month. that's a good thing. i had 1 1/2 beers on monday night bc i went to a show. it would've been 2 but i spilt 1/2, oh well, it was free :) i was going to weigh myself, but i forgot. oh well.

logic

i couldn't sleep last night and i lay awake thinking, 'it's absolutely ridiculous that not only can i not lose weight but i can't even maintain my weight'. i think binge eating is still the culprit. i barely have any appetite and sometimes feed myself bc i know i need to eat, for example, yesterday, i had a babybel cheese bc i hadn't eaten, wasn't hungry, but needed protein. this totally satisfied me for hours until i had my left overs before school. sometimes, it sends me into an eating binge, i don't realize how hungry i am until i eat and then i gorge on everything i can find or make poor chooses because the joy of food overcomes the rational mind.

i have decided a few things. 1-i took my thyroid supplement this morning, i am going to take it everyday. (i talked to my grandma on my mom's side and she has a thyroid issue too along with my dad, so i am getting the genes from both sides on this one) 2-i am going to monitor what i eat through this blog, of course i am going to try to be healthy, but everything is going up there so i have a record. 3-i am going to monitor the exercise i do no matter how minimal and include info if i was carrying a bag, etc, and again, everything is going up here so i have a record. 4-how do i see results? i am not big into weighing myself, plus my scale has a 10pound up or down rate of accuracy (don't get scales at thrift stores, folks) and i don't want to get the tape measure bc i know that will automatically deter me. i will think about this one, but basically i think i'll be able to see it, feel it and fit into my favorite clothes again if it's working!

Tuesday Food:
-lots of water throughout day
-1/2 fresh squeezed lemon & cayenne
-pear slice
-coffee
-soy creamer
-babybel cheese
-sesame citrus tofu
-broccoli
-multi whole grain rice

that's it. i got some luna bars and fruit leathers from trader joe's and i have one of each in my school bag if i get hungry at school so a) i don't spend $ and b) i don't eat crap.

Tuesday Exercise:
-morning stretches
-walked to store (approx. 1/2 mile)
-walked from store with full grocery bag and 12 roll of TP (approx 1/10 mile - took bus which i wouldn't normally do but since i still hurt, i did)
-walked to bus-stop with school bag on (approx. 1/2 mile)
-walked to class and up lots of stairs carrying bag by side (approx. 1/2 mile)
-walked from class to bus-stop (a little less than 1/2 mile)
-walked from bus-stop home carrying bag at side (a little less than 1/2 mile)
-feldenkraus block neck and back stretches
(walking total = about 2 miles)

treated myself

ok. it was valentines day, i was in pain from my side and my period and had no plans but to stay in alone and watch tv, i decided to treat myself to my favorite things: pizza and ice cream. i ordered a mushroom pizza from the cheap pizza place and it came in a shape of a heart!


later i walked to the store and got ice cream. needless to say sunday i felt quite ill. i actually can't believe i used to eat like this all the time. sunday i didn't have much of an appetite and probably had oatmeal. and then monday i still felt like i couldn't walk to the store and carry too much and i found an *amazing* vegan asian place that delivers for only $2.99 (mega cheap compared to $6.49 if i want indian and at all places (besides pizza) you have to order $20) and it was sooooooooo good. i had 2 rolls that weren't fried to death. then i got steamed dumplings that were to die for. they have avocado, blueberry and strawberry shakes, so i got a strawberry one and i would've totally been FULL. but i still had my multi-grain rice and sesame-citrus tofu with broccoli to tackle. i had a little and have a full meal for today!

i had made a list and said i would never order in again, that has been broken several times and a friend suggested to make it a treat for myself once in a while. i think i will, that is much more logical a solution anyway, moderation. i will also explore other places that deliver and not think that pizza is my only option, bc if other places are as good as this asian place, i am psyched!

happy eating, happy exercising, happy health!

cheezy poofs!

ok, so i've been in pain, as mentioned. i haven't had much of an appetite. i've been eating light: (coffee), oatmeal, soup, creamed spinach, cottage cheese, lemon juice, those are the things i can think of right now. and i ordered pizza which lasted like 3 days but by the third day it was fairly gross and hard but i nuked it til it was soft and ate it bc i didn't want to order in again and can't walk all the way to the store yet.

BUT...after illin with my friends i got home and had the munchies bad and got cheetos and reese's pieces. totally satisfying. it's my lady time so i figured i had at least one freebie. it was worth it.

i've been stretching everyday and using my feldnekraus block. yesterday i went for a hike with mel-g in the state park where they live, well, the land right off of it. it hurt at the end but i think i did really well. mel-g said she could feel the thing in my side, like a muscle firing or something. i might go to the store bc i literally have no food. or i might ride the exerbike. woo, health!